DANIEL E. BLACKSTON
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   Creativity & Reflections
by Daniel E. Blackston

Muse's March

2/7/2022

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Picture
A march can really get your feet moving. It can make crowds move, and sometimes rally teams and armies to victory -- never mind pillage and murder. But what happens when that same inspiring feeling is expressed through the lilting melodies of a pan flute, or the rainbow surface of a drifting soap bubble?

Is this even possible? If so, is it an example of transcendence?

Yes. And emphatically yes.

Take a look at Nancy Miller Gomez's poem, "Still," posted at Rattle on January 26, 2022. Click the picture above to read the full poem.

The first stanza describes a wilted apple via one of the more striking similes for death I've encountered lately:

Shriveled and brown as a shrunken head, 
it holds onto the branch even while falling

The next images carry this same sense forward:

The woman who shows up daily
for her dose of methadone.
The man punching the clock shift after shift
though he carries his heart through each day 
in a cold, empty chest. 

Finally, we see a boy who struggles in the classroom, a father on his deathbed.  All of these images tie together with Gomez's single anthemic line:

Isn’t persistence beautiful?

Do you see the march now? Of course you do. The march of those of us who are wounded, suffering, flummoxed, defeated, lonely,  stranded...

We're all in it. And we're all in it together. No matter who you are, you're broken in some way or, I'm sorry to say, probably will be someday. The good news is: persistence is beautiful . And when we persist and overcome our challenges, we are as the bird in this eloquent stanza:

The bird drops its song, over and over, 
picking it up and dropping it, 
little notes spilling down the mountain.

Gomez's tune is delicate and empathetic. But her theme booms like the most infectious (and righteous) of marches. It's the march of humanity and we're all in the ranks, following the beat (and overcoming the beatings) of life.

Let me know your thoughts and  follow me on Twitter   @BlackstonDan  
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"Counting to One"

12/8/2021

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Rattle Poetry Journal"Counting to One"

I'll take a stab in the dark and guess you probably hadn't written many poems at age seven. Even if you had written a lot of poems at that age, I'll take another stab and guess you probably hadn't published anything yet.

That's not the case for Paul Ghatak, whose excellent poem, "Counting to One," appeared in the 2021 Rattle Young Poets Anthology and is also available for reading at the ​Rattle website. Ghatak's two-liner is fresh and funny and can show us a lot about poetry if we let it.

The first thing the poem shows us is that age is no barrier to good poetry. Whether you're four years old or ninety-four years old, if you can communicate through language, you can write poems. While this might seem like a simple or even facile observation, it's actually quite important. Part of being a poet is embracing the idea that  poetry flows through everyone, and it's the poet's task to remind those who may have forgotten.

Another lesson we can take away from "Counting to One" is that humor can sometimes be sublime. In this case, the "out of the mouths of babes" factor helps, but the fact is, the lines reveal a kind of mathematical absurdity that is smile-inducing, but also thought provoking.   

The third, and maybe most important lesson we should take from "Counting to One," is the importance of titles in poetry. It's a great title and it helps pave the way for the two-lines that follow. Even better, the lines live up to the title. If you title a poem "Counting to One" and get everyone's attention, the poem better meet (or surpass) expectations. Choose titles carefully.

Last observations, the poem is nine syllables per line, basically iambic, so we can call it a true rhymed couplet. The meter and rhyme fit the poem's theme of numbers and math and direct, literal observation. The poem displays no figurative language, but makes up for it by use of the word "counting" which -- since we're only going to "one" -- is nearly figurative.

All in all a great effort. And, folks, sometimes that's all it takes to turn out a top-notch, buzzworthy poem. I hope Paul Ghatak's poetic career and fame continue to skyrocket. Big thanks to Rattle for providing us with consistently awesome work day in and day out. It's a wonderful outlet for poetry and you should check them out right now if you haven't already. 

​If you want to share thoughts or poems, send them to me by hitting the button below or the "talk" link above.​ ​

Categories

All
Camille Ralphs
Mentors
Poem Reviews
Poem Writing
Portrait Poems
Rattle Poetry
Surrealism
Sylvia Plath
Talk To Daniel
The Ariel Method

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  • Home
  • Stone Secrets Blog
  • SERVICES & FEEDBACK
    • POETRY FEEDBACK
    • Critiques and Editing
    • Poem Polisher
  • 7 Secrets of Poetry
  • Blackston Bio
  • Discover
  • ESSAYS
    • Non-Local Consciousness
    • Self-Identity
    • Being and Knowing
    • ​Concerning Kandinsky
    • Existential Metaphors
    • Sylvia Plath's "Tulips"
    • Sylvia Plath's "Blackberrying"
    • Sylvia Plath’s Ariel
  • MISSION
  • OCCULT & MAGICK
    • Ghost Flower
    • Order of the Crow